Gronk’s New Book Is About Football and Partying—But Mostly About Partying

Book cover via Gallery/Jeter Publishing

New England’s favorite kitten cuddler and Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski recently penned an autobiography, released on July 14, that’s filled with “Gronk-esque” anecdotes.

It’s Good to Be Gronk is 224 pages of Gronkowki’s wicked-good partying stories mixed in with some football talk—but mostly partying stories. Yes, Gronk has been criticized in the past for being “a big frat boy” and “a cartoon character, all exaggeration and tale tales.” But while reading his autobiography, we found a few reasons why he’s just New England’s goodnatured sweetheart/puppy dog. Below, a few noteworthy excerpts:

1. Despite what his critics say about him, he isn’t spending outrageous sums of money left and right. 

Look, to this day I still haven’t touched one dime of my signing bonus or NFL contract money. I live off my marketing money and haven’t blown any big bucks on expensive cars, expensive jewelry, or tattoos. Heck, I still wear my favorite pair of jeans from high school. I spend money on traveling with my family and friends, and on partying, and even then I make sure the tab never gets out of hand. Most of all, I don’t hurt anyone, I don’t do drugs, I don’t drive drunk, I don’t break the law.

2. Getting the call that he was going to be on the Patriots was the greatest moment of his life. 

I got off the phone and stood up, then my dad brought us all into a huddle. I gave him and my mom huge hugs and held back tears. Then Commissioner Roger Goodell said, “With the forty-second pick in the 2010 NFL Draft, the New England Patriots select Rob Gronkowski, tight end, Arizona.” We went wild and all hugged each other. I took the podium, put on my Patriot cap, then grabbed a Patriot helmet. After I thanked the commissioner, Deion Sanders interviewed me onstage and I told him, “This is the greatest moment of my life. This is unbelievable.” I was holding back tears as I talked. I was so happy. 

Just look at that face. Pure happiness.

3. He was just as excited to meet Tom Brady as any of us would be if we met Tom Brady.

While I was getting taped, Tom Brady, the legendary quarterback that I had been watching on TV since middle school, actually introduced himself to me: “Hey, I’m Tom Brady, nice to meet you.” “What’s up! I’m Rob.” I didn’t really know what to say other than that. Being a rookie, I was intimidated and didn’t want to say the wrong thing. I had all the respect in the world for him and did not want to get on his wrong side. I couldn’t know it at the time, but that would end up pretty much the nicest he was to me over the entire year.

Were we the only ones holding our breath while reading this part? This is where our favorite football bromance seems to have begun. It turns out that Brady was more of a drill sergeant than best buddy for a while—not that Gronk minded all that much because according to him, “he was Tom Brady and he was right.” Amen.

4. One time he knocked a girl through a glass table—and he felt awful about it. 

My back foot slipped off the platform and I fell straight down next to where Mojo was dancing with these two hot girls. I landed right on one of them and knocked her through a glass table. She totally broke my fall. The glass shattered and exploded. The whole place went silent… I was scared she was dead… Thank God she started moving… Everyone was still silent and in shock. Then she threw her hair back and yelled, “Give me another shot!” The entire place cheered her on… I was so impressed I took her as my date to Dan’s wedding. 

If you were curious, Mojo Rawley is a WWE Wrestler, and Dan is one of Rob’s older brothers who is a former football tight end.

5. Although people are more inclined to talk about his partying ways, Gronk is an active participant in charity work.

I went to Gillette Stadium on June 3 to take part in the Buzz Off for Kids with Cancer. To raise money for pediatric cancer research and to have fun with the kids, I let them shave off all the hair on my head. The event helped raise $500,000 for the cause and I loved hanging out with those kids.

Gronk might be a party animal, but at the end of the day, you can always count on the guy to do some good for the community. A little later in the book, Gronk discusses visiting Boston Children’s Hospital while he was wheelchair-bound due to a torn ACL and MCL. He details how he was blown away by the children’s courage and will to keep fighting no matter what, and how inspiring that was for him. Awww, Gronk!

6. But despite all of Gronk’s sweetheart moments, he’s still holding on to his notable party rocker antics. After winning the Super Bowl, it’s been a non-stop celebration in Boston.

We had an awesome victory parade where fans threw jerseys for me to sign, footballs, even cans of beer for me to chug. It was a blast! I won the Comeback Player of the Year Award, and that was special to me, but it’s the Super Bowl ring on my finger that shines brightest.

We all know how much fun Gronk had at the victory parade, as seen here, here, here and here.

7. It all goes back to his early days. During his college football season, he was a committed and hardworking player, but when the season was over, he turned into his true party self. 

At our house, the front door and back door were perfectly aligned to form a straight line right through the living room, kitchen, and hallway. The hallway was a tiled floor… We would invite all the hot athletic and sorority girls over, then take dishwashing liquid and squirt it all over the floor to make it slippery. We would then squirt it all over ourselves to get lubed up and then throw water all over the place. The name of the game was to make it from door to door sliding on your chest, and the only way to make it was to get a fast head start. 

If there is any footage of this anywhere, please release it immediately.

If you’re still lacking some Gronk in your life, you can meet the man, the myth, the legend in person. On Saturday, July 18, Gronk will be on hand to sign copies of It’s Good to Be Gronk at Willow Books & Cafe in Acton. Then on Sunday, July 19, he’ll do the same at BJ’s on Whittier Street in Framingham. If that’s not enough, don’t forget your opportunity to splurge on tickets to sail with him on a booze cruise to his private island, and remember—always be Gronk.