Weekend Redux: What You Missed
Just because you spent all weekend watching Spring Training coverage doesn’t mean the world stopped moving. We round up the notable stories you missed.
Saturday
MBTA conspiracy theorists, rejoice. Suddenly chatty MBTA General Manager Dan Grabauskas admits the agency cut bus and subway trips to save money without telling riders.
“We were not telling the truth to our customers before when we were not delivering the service that was scheduled,” Grabasukas said in an interview. “But we began to remedy that when I came on two years ago, and I know we’ve improved service.”
Yeah. By adjusting the train schedules to reflect how crappy the service is. Thanks, Dan.
We’ve noticed that a lot of our friends have been popping cold medicine like jellybeans this winter. It’s not just our unwashed companions who are suffering—Boston is in the midst of a bona fide flu epidemic. If you’ll excuse us for a moment, we’re going to disinfect our desks and buy a vat of Purell.
Is everyone going to run out and buy a beagle because Uno won the Westminster Dog Show? Short answer: Only if he gets a great endorsement deal like the Taco Bell Chihuahua.
Dear lawsuit-happy Rams fans,
Sincerely,
Boston Daily
Sunday
Finally, some tangible proof we’re in a recession—bank robberies are on the rise.
If Dan Grabauskas isn’t starting trouble, it’s the Boston Firefighters Union. In an attempt to take another shot at Mayor Tom Menino, union members stood on the banks of Boston Harbor to warn that firefighters don’t know what to do if a tanker ignites on its way to Everett. But rest easy—if that stuff catches, it will go up so fast you’ll all be dead before the firefighters make it out.
Boston Daily understands why some people don’t like the new Celtics Dancers. Legendary coach Red Auerbach didn’t want them to distract from the sport. But we don’t understand why someone who hates those dancers would go poking around online for more pictures of them.
Even the homepage of the dancers’ website declares: “Dancers in Sports Illustrated: Who needs the swimsuit issue?” When I clicked on the link, I got a close-up of one particularly well-endowed dancer who happened to be caught full-frontal at the very highest point of her high kick. In stretch-tight pants, needless to say.
Hey, at last she’s wearing pants. Clearly, this op-ed writer hasn’t been doing much Googling on Paris Hilton or Britney Spears.
Monday
Patriots coach Bill Belichick finally responds to SpyGate beyond his stock “moving on” refrain.
“I take responsibility for it,’’ he continued. ‘‘Even though I felt there was a gray area in the rule and I misinterpreted the rule, that was my mistake and we’ve been penalized for it. I apologize to everybody that is involved — the league, the other teams, the fans, our team, for the amount of conversation and dialogue that it’s caused.“
But what’s really interesting is the growing battle between the Patriots and cameraman Matt Walsh. Walsh has hinted he has further damning evidence against the team, while management paints him as a guy who loved to secretly tape everything. Including conversations with Patriots officials, which is partially why he was fired.
Our favorite tabloid is enjoying stirring up trouble recently. It got Mayor Menino to fix up the blighted Hendry Street area, and now the Herald is calling out the Boston Police Department review panel for meeting behind closed doors and not keeping minutes. The agency was established to foster the public’s trust. We want to trust you, but you need to communicate with us.
Further proof we’re in a recession—“wardrobing” is on the rise. This is when cheap people buy something, use it, then return it to get their money back. Classy.
And if you see a social worker, try to give him or her a hug. But be careful—they’re a little jumpy lately.
