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John Lam’s Date Night Must-Haves

In the run-up to March's Don Quixote, the Boston Ballet Principal shares his favorite things for an evening out with his valentine.


Photo by Olivia Moon

Boston Ballet Principal John Lam’s meet-cute with his now-husband, real estate attorney John Ruggieri, involved a laundromat and a park bench. What followed next was a month of persistence by Ruggieri and, finally, a first date. Fast-forward 14 years and the two are married with two handsome young sons. As Lam prepares for next month’s Don Quixote, which follows the titular character on a hunt for love and adventure, we thought it perfect timing to highlight his favorite things for an evening out with his valentine.

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1. The Shoes

“When I get dressed up offstage, I still want to feel fabulous, and Valentine’s Day is special, so I throw on a blazer jacket from Mr. Tom Ford and finish the look with ‘Dandelion Spikes’ Louboutins—always a fun addition to any date night.”

$1,345, Christian Louboutin.

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2. The Hair Product

“Bumble and Bumble ‘Surf Spray’ is what I use to tame my locks on date night and onstage! And I can’t forget my hairstylist Margaret Nguyen at Salon Marc Harris, who has been taking care of all my haircuts/styling needs so that my hair is perfect on- and offstage.”

$16 for 1.7 oz., Salon Marc Harris.

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3. The Gift

“Jewelry has always been a splurge for us. So when it comes to choosing a special gift for John, I look to Turco Brothers. This year I’m thinking of grabbing Benchmark’s ‘The Edison’ black-titanium band with black channel-set diamonds. It has a masculine look to it and just the
right amount of bling.”

$1,455, Turco Brothers.

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4. The Love Note

“John really loves it when I write him sweet little notes, so Valentine’s Day is a fun excuse to zhuzh it up a bit. Luckily, Paper Source is also super close to the ballet studio. I always manage to find darling ‘homemade’-type cards there to write the perfect sweet nothings on.”

“Spoiler Alert” greeting card, $6, Paper Source.

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5. The Restaurant

“Abe and Louie’s has the best steak in town by far! It’s my go-to restaurant when I want to impress my honey or vice versa.”

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6. The Cologne

“A hop over from Boston Ballet is Neiman Marcus, where I can easily grab my favorite scent, Creed ‘Aventus’ cologne. It’s both woody and fresh, which is something John adores.”

$495 for 3.3 oz., Neiman Marcus.

First published in the print edition of the February 2023 issue, with the headline “John Lam’s Date Night.”